If you're a white girl, your middle name is either Marie, Ann, or Lynne. However did I know? I'm just that good.

So many speeches, so little time in that lovely class. My next is informative. I'm thinking of doing something possibly morbid like embalming the dead. Just picturing my visual aid makes me smile. Of course, it isn't a how-to speech, so I'm not sure if I'll do that subject. Any ideas, please comment. I'd looove to hear it.

We're moving tomorrow! So exciting. All of our friends keep saying "make sure everything is boxed up." I think they've all had the same bad experience. David Sedaris wrote (I can't remember if it's in Naked or Me Talk Pretty One Day and I can't check cuz I'm at work) about how he worked helping people move out of their New York apartments for a little while, and how one time his group got to a girl's house and she had nothing boxed. She was one of those girls who was used to having guys bend over backwards for her, so she didn't even get off her phone, she just motioned for them to start packing things. After they finished moving her, she gave them nothing but a toothy smile for a tip. So that's what we're planning on doing to our friends. I'm just trying to decide who has the better smile between Brandon and I.

Happy Birthday, Brandon!

Nobody turns 24 like you do, sweetie. All... well. And stuff. Good job! I love you! :)

Global Personality Test Results

Sensate (43%) moderately low which suggests you are not very empathetic, sensitive, or considerate of others. Intellectual (63%) moderately high which suggests you tend to be internally motivated, self seeking, and independent. Assertive (40%) moderately low which suggests you are timid, indirect, and unable to start and/or follow through on things.

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Here's a conversation we had driving to work today:

Wendy: I don't get why girls encourage their boyfriends to succeed in rock bands. If the band makes it, the boyfriend will become a whøre and end up cheating on the girl with billions of groupies. They're bound to break up.
Brandon: It's because the girl knows the guy generally won't succeed. That's why she encourages him.
Wendy: For brownie points? Just to look all supportive?
Brandon: Pretty much, yeah.
Wendy: Nice. I should blog this conversation, but then we'll get hits for the word "whøre."

Today is such a beautiful day. The sky is blue, no clouds, and so far it's not too hot.

But I'm at work. I'll be at work until the lovely sun starts to set. There will be no trip to the beach, no enjoying today except for the occasional glance out the window. It's such a nice day that I forget I'll be busy most of my weekend, and actually rejoice that it is Friday. Another week is almost over.

On to another topic, my mom and sister are coming to visit me in late July. That's another reason I'm happy, as I found out this morning that the plane tickets have been bought. Now I'm just trying to think things that they would enjoy doing in southern California. This will actually be the first time anyone from the South has flown to California to visit us, so I'm trying to plan ahead of time. Any ideas, (other than Disneyland and Hollywood) feel free to comment. :)

I had to come in late at work yesterday because we had our pre-inspection at our apartment. What this basically is, is our managers along with some lady from the management company come and critique what we've done with the place. They check for stuff like missing walls, broken cabinets, stained carpet etc. Well, I guess you can say that we passed with flying colors. Not that our apartment looks like it is worthy of passing, but since the place was flooded a couple of months I think it still looks pretty darn good. The reason that this is so important is that it is more than just some dorm inspection we use to have in college. This represents the end of a stage in our life. This is the apartment we obtained with much gratitude when we first got married. But at the same time, we're growing tired of the neighborhood and are excited to have a very short commute to work now. Our new place will hopefully supply us with many wonderful memories.

My next speech is on a cultural artifact. It has to be an object that I can bring in. I was thinking maybe a huge belt buckle to represent the southern culture, or something along those lines, but I've also gotten some pretty good ideas from Seth. Comment if you have any ideas. I have to give my topic tonight.

Happy Easter, everyone! We're heading to San Bernadino for some Easter family fun, so pray that we don't get stuck in traffic. And that I find all of the good eggs.

I went into full-scale girl mode this morning. Those who know me know this is highly unusual. Yes, I screamed. Yes, I panicked. Yes, I called for Brandon to come save me. Let me explain.

So I was just about ready for work and everything, and I planned to wear a pair of shoes I hadn't worn since Monday. Unfortunately, I rested my foot on my leg as I placed on a shoe, transferring something on to my pant leg my shoe had been carrying since then. It was a worm. An earth worm, to be precise. A slimy, nasty, disgusting earthworm that smelled like dirt. I screamed. I yelled for Brandon. I tried to fling it on the floor. Part of it stuck to my finger due to its goo, causing me to scream, "BRANDON!!!" even louder. He was probably there already. I was vaguely aware of him picking up the worm with a paper towel and saying that it wasn't that big of a deal.

And why was it that big of a deal? I'd baited worms while fishing as a child. I'd played with some pretty creepy critters. And more recently, I washed some pretty nasty dishes and even cleaned the bathroom. I think it was so bad because I didn't see it coming. I hadn't braced myself. So for the first time since I can remember, I had a hysterical girl fit over something icky. At least Goo Gone gets out earth worm goo. Ugh.

My self-proclaimed feminist teacher explained to the class yesterday exactly why it is offensive for a man to open the door for a woman. She said that back in the olden days, a man had to invite a woman into a building by opening the door, because otherwise she was not allowed to enter. I never understood where this idea came from before. I mean, here in America, we live in a society where the idea of a woman being unable to walk into a building unless a man allowed her to is pretty unfamiliar. To me, if a guy opens a door, it means that he took his time to do a favor for me that he didn't have to do. I don't have to pull open a heavy door and I'm reminded that humans still care about each other. When I mentioned this to Brandon, he asked about when some one opens the door for you as you are leaving a building. Are you to be offended that they are allowing you out into the world? It all seems silly.

When I was little, an older kid told me that the devil was in the physical form just like us, but he was invisible. So basically he walked around the earth doing evil and got away with it because no one could see him. So my idea was to randomly shoot a cannon around in order to kill the devil. I wondered, "Why hasn't anyone thought of this before?" We would get rid of the devil by chance. He'd get hit, and we'd know he died because suddenly all evil in the world would cease. That and there would probably be a thud. Maybe some blood and a bit of drama or maybe something like what happens when you beat a video game. I didn't have the ending figured out, but at least I knew how to get the job done.